Revenge of the Boob

Unless you've been under a rock somewhere in the blogosphere you've probably heard about the controversy over Facebook removing pictures of breastfeeding from their site. This is where a little grassroots blogging comes in. The League of Maternal Justice was formed and has encouraged us to flood the web with videos nursing Moms and pictures of nursing babies.

Breastfeeding is HARD WORK. It's kind of a dirty little secret that no one shares. Women need support, they need to see other people doing it and they need people to get over the objectification of the breast and get in line with the American Academy of Pediatrics that says that breast milk is best for babies by making it easier for women to breastfeed, not harder. I am lucky that I have an employer who, through their employee assistance plan, paid for all but $50 of my breast pump and has a room in every building where you can pump in relative quiet and comfort.

Nursing Moms and their precious babies shouldn't be relegated to restrooms and the backseats of their cars. Really, I'd rather see a happy baby and perhaps a tiny sliver of skin than to hear the cries of a hungry baby. I suspect those same people who wouldn't want to see a woman feeding a baby in public are the same ones who'd tell her that she needs to do something to quiet that baby down or move somewhere else. I've never seen anyone baring it all, even in more private nursing places. Most Moms I know try to keep as much covered as possible while getting things hooked up and then, there is no nipple exposed. A baby is more obscene than pasties?

I do have to say, there is a fine line between supporting breastfeeding and making women who just can't make it work feel bad. I worked with a lactation consultant (thanks Becky!) from pretty much the moment my first was born. I'd been very sick and with all that my body had been through milk production wasn't high on its list of supported functions. I was in tears at 4AM in the hospital, alone, pressured by the nursery nurses to give PDQ formula and hearing the lactation consultant and childbirth instructors in the back of my head--breast only! It was hard, perhaps the hardest thing I've ever done to continue to try and nurse her. When I had to supplement with formula I felt like a failure. I think we need to encourage a culture where feeding your baby doesn't become another of the ways women make each other feel bad (okay, off that soapbox now).

So, in your face, Facebook. Enjoy these photos of well-fed babies:

Cleveland Rocks!

The first time I went to an Indians game it was in Municipal Stadium. We were in great seats and there were about 10,000 people at the game. The next time I went to an Indians game it was at Jacobs Field and the seats weren't great but they were all filled. I waited in line at Thanksgiving to get tickets to a game or two the following season. The last time the Indians were in the playoffs I lived near Cleveland. The last time the Indians were in the playoffs there was no football in Cleveland. The last time the Indians were in the playoffs we had a get together every night to watch the games, eat, drink and be merry. The last time the Indians were in the playoffs I had no husband, no kids, no furniture, no mortgage and lots of time to sleep.

I stayed up entirely too late last night watching the Indians take out the Yankees in four games in the American League Division Series. A little insight into this obsession--I got an e-mail from my Mother first thing this morning that simply said "Go Tribe! Boston here we come!"

Monday, Monday

Back to the grind after a busy weekend. Where the heck does time go? How could it possibly be October already? September is a blur. I forgot that the beginning of school brings chaos, here I was thinking that it was good to get back in a routine--HA!

We've had two back to school nights, training for our mid-week youth program at church, soccer practice and games, brownies, and brownie cookie Mom training just to name a few fun things. We never get invited to parties and our neighborhood had one two weeks ago and we've been invited to another Saturday night. On top of it I fit in a coffee with the ladies, stamp camp and a night at Let's Dish so we could actually eat this month. The girls have both been to the dentist, Boobah to the doctor twice, acupuncture, I had to go visit my friendly gyn and today I have to go to the dentist. Thank goodness for Outlook syncing GMan and I up or we'd never been anywhere on time!

So here's to October and maybe NOW we can getting into a normal, sane schedule?

Things overheard at my house:

(Boobah and PDQ getting into the van in the garage)
Boobah: You don't say SHIT.
Me: Hey, we don't say that word.
Boobah: I know, that's what I just said!

Boobah: Daddy, will you kill this bug for me?
Gman: Sure
Boobah: Okay, I will clean up the guts with a tissue

Upon finding Boobah and PDQ in the bathroom washing a flip flop in the sink.
Me: What are you doing?
Boobah: Cleaning off bug guts, we deaded it with the shoe

Finally, happy birthday to Esmerelda (a day late). We did celebrate with her last night. A flight of margaritas and chocolate cake--what more could a girl want?

I HEART our pediatrician

When I arrived to pick Boobah up this afternoon at preschool she was sitting on the directors lap with a wet paper towel on her eye. Apparently she had been on the receiving end of a hand full of sand in the newly topped off sand box of doom. I hate the sandbox, I hate getting it out of her hair and shoes but getting it out of her eye, even worse.

When we left the school she said it was okay and bravely threw away her wet paper towel. After our 15 minute trip through the grocery store on the way home, she was howling that it hurt and begging me to find her wet paper towel. I retrieved the paper towel and called her doctor's office. I left a number and by the time we were home, a nurse was calling me back. Score 1 for the office. I told her what happened, she asked how close I was and when we confirmed I could be there in 10 minutes she said come right over. Score 2. We arrived about 15 minutes later (of course Boobah was taking her daily poop when I got off the phone--NOT something you rush!). The wait was brief. Score 3. She got to see her regular pediatrician (not that it mattered to me but it made her day. He came in, took a look at her, told me he was glad I brought her, even after he determined it was just the sclera that was a bit scratched and not her cornea. Score 4. He gave her a high five and shook my hand. We were in and out of the office in less than an hour from when I called. Priceless. Thanks Dr. M.

If it had been an adult that had the same problem we'd be sitting in the emergency room. It would cost $50 and we might be there all night long contracted some horrible disease and seeing things that no one wants to see. Even if I was able to get into see my doctor it would be hours from I arrived, not an hour from when I called that I would finally get seen. Why can we have great health care for our kids and not get the same kind of care for ourselves. Believe me, I've looked. I am just glad to have a gyn who actually calls me back. If I didn't have to have another doctor I'd pick him anytime but he delivers babies and obviously THAT can screw with your schedule.

So, here's to our dear pediatrician and the fantastic office staff. Could I convince you to see me?

Mindless Summer Fun

We did a whole lot of NOTHING this weekend. Its been an intense couple of weeks, it was hotter than hades and everyone just needed some serious chillaxin'. I went to the gym, church, the farm market, and the grocery store between Friday night and this evening and those were the only times I left the house. I watched a whole lot of nothin' on TV--The Biggest Loser special editions, hours of FoodTV and Dr. 90210. My mind is officially mush.

I did make the effort to go to the farm market today and they had just picked lima beans. I LOVE fresh lima beans. I don't know why frozen ones from the store just aren't the same--but they are not. Growing up we cooked them, then when the water was mostly gone added milk and butter and ate it over white bread. I have no idea why, I just know that it was GOOD. Today I bought 5 pounds of lima beans. It is so hard to tell how much that is in terms of beans because the pods are so big. I brought them home and shelled them and shelled them and shelled them in front of the mindless TV. I cooked some and stuck a bag full in the freezer. They were delicious. Between that and the salad with fresh, halved yellow and red cherry tomatoes, a bit of fresh basil, mozarella and balsamic vinegar--it tasted like summer.

Es and her boys came over to share in the bounty. I also whipped up some homemade ice cream, it was our second batch since receiving the freezer for Christmas.

MM: Does it turn off when its done?
GM: Nope
MM: How long should it go?
GM: The instructions said 15 minutes
MM: How long has it been?
GM: I don't know
MM: So, how will you know when its done
GM: Last time I listened to it and I knew. Your Dad says it is when water comes out of the drain hole.

Takin' Care of Bid-ness

I've been tagged by my PIM* Jenni over at Chaos Among Us for a meme.

1) I must post 7 random things about me:

• My middle name is Adair and I've passed it along to my youngest daughter


• I can tie a knot in a cherry stem with my tongue


• From the time I was 7 until last January I couldn't see the big E on the eye chart, thank goodness for LASIK


• I've got several groups of PIMs--the working Moms including the coiner of the the term MotherGooseMouse and the second wives whom I couldn't do without (its been almost 10 years!) and the group of ladies I met on BabyCenter when we were all ttc'ing, I've met at least 1 person from each of the groups


• I was at work at the stroke of midnight on 1/1/2000 because I was coordinating the project for my company, the facilities guy had the CEO flipped out because he was wearing his glasses with side flashlights "just in case"


• We moved into our house one year ago this weekend--the trim still isn't up in our bedroom although the floor has been there a whole year now.


• My big girl is spending her first camp overnight. Its nature camp and its nearly directly across the street from work so I'll be sure to peak in on her in the morning. (Pictures to come from Gman I am sure!)

2) Tag 7 other bloggers

• As afraid as I am of this, go for it Gman


• You too SleepwhenURdead


• Go to it Tree


• And Lotta


• Ok, now Sizzle


• And The Mayberrys


• Last, but certainly not least, MackeyDoodle

3) Post Rules & the bloggers I tagged here.

4) Leave tagged bloggers comments on their web sites so that they know they have been tagged
*PIM Psycho Internet Mommy

Then, my dear, sweet husband awarded me this...'cause it takes one to know one--Greeblemonkey made him an honorary chick.

So I am supposed to give the same shout out to 5 of my favorite girly bloggers who deserve it...of course he already named a lot of them. I've still got Chaos Among Us, Lotta, The Mayberrys, and I'm sure someone else has done it but Notes From the Trenches and Suburban Bliss.

You can take the girl out of the country and more

...but I don't think you can ever really take the country out of the girl. I headed back out to the farm this evening and picked another 5 lbs of blueberries. Its much quicker picking without my "helpers." It was almost as fun listening to the other people and their theories on the best way to pick. There are two distinct camps--pick everything that is ripe off one bush before moving on is the first. These people will scan the bush up one side and down the other not leaving a single ripe berry. Then there are the random pickers, they kind of mosey from bush to bush picking a little here and a little there. With the girls I followed the first method, it gave them some goals to work towards. Tonight I picked a little here and a little there--mostly going deep into the bushes for untouched berries that took a little work to get to or at the very top of the bushes where it took a little doing to bring them down to pick them. I was reminded that you can't be in too big a hurry or the really good ripe ones will fall off onto the ground--something to be said for slowing down, taking your time and experiencing the journey as well as the rewards. I stopped at the farm store and got a few more green beans and some just pulled onions as well. I am really trying to focus more on local food this summer.

On the way home from said berry picking I stopped and bought a canning pot and rack. I am determined to make some pickles this summer with local pickling cucumbers. My grandmother made fabulous sweet pickles. They were bright green from a little added food coloring and so sweet. My father used the juice as his ingredient in potato and pasta salads. I've never braved canning before so wish me luck! I also requested the recipe for this great frozen pizza sauce my mom made when we had more tomatoes than we knew what to do with. If I hit the jackpot on tomatoes I might try canning a few quarts of those as well. In the serious 'burbs canning supplies aren't that easy to come by believe it or not!

Finally, I heard this story today and had to pass it on. The receptionist at work is a dear sweet woman who is in her early 70s. She is about the nicest person you will ever meet. She's been at the company for many, many years--she used to work with punch cards if that tells you anything. Gman stopped to get me for lunch on Monday and she was beside herself, a young friend of her family was dying of breast cancer that had spread. They called the whole family in saying she only had hours to live as her liver was shutting down. It was obvious that she was distraught over the impending loss. She stopped me this morning and told me that shortly after the announcement that she had hours to live another group of doctors came in and cleared everyone out but the woman and her husband. They had been pouring over her medical records and noticed that there was a sign of a fungal infection in the early days after she was admitted. No one had paid attention. This can sometimes cause it to look like the liver is shutting down. They started a treatment and her numbers had miraculously fallen over night. The nurses were running to get the doctors every time new lab work came back because they couldn't believe what they were seeing. I really felt like this, in combination with what I've been reading lately from Especially Heather, Schmutzie, and Toddler Planet was a reminder to slow down and appreciate what I have...every. single. day. You can join in supporting WhyMommy in her fight against inflammatory breast cancer by adding the Team WhyMommy button. Head on over to Canape Sun to get your button. She is starting chemo at 8:30 AM on Thursday, keep her in your thoughts.

Blueberry Pickin'

Friday night the girls and I ventured out to a nearby farm to pick blueberries. I warned everyone that they needed to go to the bathroom before we left. Did they? Of course not. We weren't there for 10 minutes before the "I have to PEE" whining started. I told them if they concentrated on finding the biggest, bluest berries it would help take their mind off their ordeal. PDQ said I was right it helped. Finally about 4 pounds of berries later I couldn't take it any more. As we drove the circuitous route back through the farm fields I spotted a port-a-potty. (Of course it was on the other side of the blueberry bushes if only I'd known we could have walked down the row and been there). We stopped, PDQ went first, was in the outhouse 5 seconds before she declared she didn't have to go any more. I reminded her of the previous half hour and she relented, I told her to hold her nose if she had to but she. was. going. They both managed to go, although there were lots of questions about the blue water and the smell and the urinal cakes.

After we got home I whipped up my favorite blueberry recipe, a lemon, blueberry pound cake that I got from Cooking Light. It is light and wonderful. It calls for a bundt pan but I generally make it in two loaf pans, one to eat, one to share or freeze. I also like to add a little lemon zest to the cake and the glaze (you have to squeeze the lemons anyway, might as well use them all!).

Blueberry Pound Cake (from Cooking Light)

2 c granulated sugar
½ c light butter
½ block light cream cheese softened (4 oz cc)
3 large eggs
1 large egg white
3 c all purpose flour divided
2 c fresh or frozen blueberries
1 t baking powder
½ t baking soda
½ t salt
1 8oz carton low-fat lemon yogurt
2 t vanilla extract
cooking spray
1 c powdered sugar
4 t lemon juice (about the juice of 1 lemon)

Preheat oven to 350F
Beat first 3 ingredients at medium speed until well blended (about 5 minutes).
Add eggs and egg white, 1 at a time beating well after each addition. Lightly spoon flour into dry measuring cups; level with a knife.
Combine 2 T flour with blueberries in a small bowl and mix well.
Combine remaining flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Add flour mixture to sugar mix alternately with yogurt, beginning and ending with flour mixture.
Fold in blueberry mixture and vanilla; pour cake batter into a 10-inch tube pan coated with cooking spray (I use two loaf pans instead and it turns out well and there is one to freeze!)
Bake at 350F for 70 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. (For the loaf pans I usually set the timer for 50 minutes and start checking, for the convection oven I go with 325F)
Cool cake in pan 10 minutes; remove from pan. Combine powdered sugar and lemon juice in small bowl, drizzle over warm cake.

Yesterday I tackled blueberry freezer jam for the first time. I was glad to see that it was setting up well last night and can't wait to taste. I think it will be a nice change from strawberry during the long winter. I am reading Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver. Its really opened my eyes to the impact of eating more locally grown food so I am trying to do my part. We'll be out at the farm picking more fruits and veggies as well as hitting the local farmers markets. Not only does it reduce the fossil fuels needed to get our food to us, it just tastes better! The book is just generally a good read and I'd recommend it for anyone who even dreams of having their own little plot of land--the family commits to getting all their food from local sources for a year.

For the love of books

One of the best things about vacation was having a chance to read uninterrupted. I read in the car, in bed, on the balcony looking at the beach and it was heaven. I happened to pick up In Her Shoes by Jennifer Weiner from Liz's bookshelves (thanks Liz!) and started reading it, it was great so I bought a copy at the next bookstore we came across. I can't say I remember seeing the movie come out but I have it in my Netflix queue now, I hope its not a disappointment. As soon as we got back I was hungry for more. I got Little Earthquakes at the library (actually 2 copies, leaving something else I wanted on the shelf) and I finished it last night. What a great story, great characters, it brought back the new mom memories in such vivid detail it had in me tears more than once. Definitely summer reading chick lit.

Lean Mean Thirteen the next numbered Stephanie Plum book is out and I am on the waiting list at the library. I have a couple more Jennifer Weiner books to read and I am waiting for Animal, Vegetable, Mineral that Tree turned me onto as well. Of course I have to find the time to read them but I always have at least one book going, I like to relax in the bath tub at night with my book and a little lavender oil as part of my night time, beat insomnia routine. I am always fighting the desire to read rather than sleep--I know that is bad and have been trying REALLY hard not to do it.

Anyone else feel like something is missing without a book in progress and one waiting in the wings? I'd say it is the biggest difference between Gman and I, reading for pleasure is pretty much a foreign concept for him. He likes listening to books on tape/CD but actually sitting down with a book just isn't his thing. It's also one of the things that I hope the kids pick up from me, I want desperately for them to be able to enjoy and lose themselves in a good book. What is on your summer reading list? Anything that you just can't wait to dig into? Happy reading!

An Open Threat to Little Bunny Foo Foo

Little Bunny Foo Foo
I don't want to see you,
Eatin' up the garden
and makin' yourself at home.

And down came the meeeeeeeeeean Mommy

and she said:

Little Bunny Foo Foo,

I don't want to see you,

Eatin' up the garden

and makin' yourself at home.

I'll give you threeeeeee chances to stop eatin' up the garden

and if you don't, I'm turning you into food!

First it was the broccoli, every darned leaf--GONE.

Then it was the snapdragons, just the leaves but every bloom as well, they were yellow

Then it was the roses, the ladies at stamping insisted that bunnies wouldn't eat the roses because of the thorns.

This afternoon I actully *saw* the rabbit making herself at home to LAY DOWN by the rose bush to eat day lillies. Not only do I have a rabbit eating my garden, I have the world's laziest Mama Bunny. She dug herself a little indentation and flopped down so she could munch. I mean, I know what she feels like but come on, give me a break.When I went to get a closer shot she took off and I saw at least 4 little bunnies scurry with her and then another 2 over by the decimated broccoli. Come on, I got plenty of weeds. Pleeeeeeeease stay out of the stuff I'm actually TRYING to grow...or we'll have to eat you!

Blog Blast...Tales from the School Cafeteria

When I went to school in southern Ohio many moons ago there was no cafeteria lunch. There were vending machines or you could bring your brown paper bag. There was a very strict rule though about eating IN the cafeteria. For some reason that escapes me now (we are having our TWENTIETH HS reunion this summer) we decided that eating outside of the band room would be cool. Yes, we were geeks thinking about total rebellion. So we hung out, outside the bandroom talking about boys and weekend plans eating our sandwiches and apples. Unbeknownst to us, the Vice Princial could see us from his office window as we hung out, no doubt looking guilty as hell because we were upstanding citizens breaking the law. He sent his henchmen for us and dragged us into his office. All but one of us were first time rule breakers, there were many tears. The others got sentenced to Saturday School. The Veep said he didn't actually see me eat anything and gave me credit for being Big Jim's daughter and let me slide. There was serious fury in our little circle about Saturday School and no one was particularly happy about me not joining them. I will say it was the only time in the six years my father was a teacher in my school that it worked in MY favor.

Wow, that was a long time ago. Now I'll actually have a daughter eating in the school cafeteria next year. Today they are having a trial lunch, I can't wait to hear her reaction to the chicken nugget and pizza extravaganza provided by the school to entice them into buying lunch next year. This has been something I've given a lot of thought to, face it, I am basically lazy and for the past six years my daycare provider has provided lunch for the kids. Next year I am faced with fixing at least one and perhaps two lunches everyday--things my kids will eat, that pack easily and last but not least are nutritional. My husband and I have both fought our weight nearly all our lives and want to spare our children that pain.

At the suggestion of Parent Bloggers Network, off I went to check School Menu and its parental counterpart Family Everyday, two sites that work together with School Food Services Directors to provide and promote healthy eating and physical fitness for kids and their parents. I read the first article on the Truth About School Lunches that filled me in on the requirements that the school must meet in their lunch offerings. It made me feel better about what needs to be offered by the school, I know that I need to play my part in making sure my daughters are well informed on what good choices are--considering that edamame and celery are two favorites I hope we are well on our way! The Family Everyday site is geared towards parents with articles and discussion boards on good nutrition, school lunch, and fitness. Its offshoot School Menu is definitely aimed at kids. Bright graphics, music, a general High School Music with and edge, kind of feeling. I'd definitely let my daughters cruise through hear and play the games focused on Veggies, Cheese and Knowing Your Fats. I was disappointed not to find my school among those with the menus linked to the site but know just where to find it on my school system website. Check out the sites, a good reminder aimed at the parent and child audiences how important nutrition is and how to make it fun!

Dipping into the herbal pond in search of sleep

As I am sure you read yesterday I hardly slept at all Monday night. It was miserable. Yesterday morning Mr. D my acupuncturist helped me get control of my yang energy and sent me on the way with instructions to apply pressure to a point on my head several times during the day and report back on how I slept last night. When I got to work my friend who has been taking an herbal medicine course forwarded me this newsletter on sleeping well. She also forwarded her recommendations on herbs I could take that might make me sleep better. Really, at this point in time I’ll try damned near anything to get a good nights sleep.

I headed off to the natural foods store in search of the herbs she had suggested—one for sleep and one for the eczema that has had me itching for months. Total strike out at that store but I did score Gman his favorite spring rolls, spicy pumpkin seeds, tamari roasted almonds, lavender essential oil and arnica cream. The fact that I know that those things exist and what they are used for caused me a bit of a smile. Oh how granola crunchy this redneck has become. In the meantime I had Gman at home removing the wireless phone and other electrical cords (like the newsletter said) from around our bed to eliminate the EMF pollution (something I had no idea existed two days ago) that might could possibly having an impact on my sleep. Side note: I get the Mother of the Year nomination for yesterday when I sent Boobah to preschool and afternoon enrichment only to get a call that enrichment ended last week, could I please come get her. Thanks to Gman for retrieving her and hanging with her yesterday afternoon making my bedroom more pure from an electronic point of view.

I did manage to find my herbal extract last night. Ashwagandha is supposed to support my adrenals and control stress—who me? I bought the big bottle since it was the only thing they had and bravely dropped it into my water along with the Burdock root to work on my skin. The results were slight brown tinged water—mmmmmm, yummy. The taste, really weak tea, not sure I could handle less than the 20 oz of water I put my 2 ml of extract into. I did manage to get it down without any gagging. I plowed through 12 meals at Let’s Dish to fill up my freezer and eliminate another source of my stress.

Okay, finally I was done for the day, time to go home and see if the alternative approach would get me the sleep I desperately needed. Acupuncture, herbs, a bath with lavender oil and an EMF-free sleeping zone were my hopes for a peaceful night. I lay down, got reasonably comfortable and didn’t fall asleep right away. Even though I didn’t nod off immediately I was calm, no obsessing about my mental or physical health. Eventually I fell asleep hard. I did wake up a couple of times during the night to go to the bathroom (getting rid of the 90 oz a day I’ve been trying to get down) but I was strangely serene plodding to do my business and go back to bed. It didn’t take much more than putting my head down to get to sleep. My pessimistic side says that I would have slept reasonably well last night no matter what else I’d done from pure exhaustion. But even exhausted I don’t usually feel that kind of calm, I am usually making mental notes of something in the middle of the night. So I call it a win. Not nearly as much sleep as I need but WAY more than I’ve been getting. I will repeat the process tonight, keep everything crossed for me—please. We are heading to visit my family for the weekend which is generally a sleep-free experience for me so it would be nice to go into it well rested.

So, this is "normal"?

Things are back to “normal” in our little corner of the world today. PDQs babysitter is back from sick leave and PDQ was excited to go back to her house today—thank goodness. I was a bit worried that playing with the little girl next door in the morning, spending time with the great Miss Lois and more Mommy/Daddy time was going to make a return to normalcy a bitter pill to swallow. Luckily a preemptive Thursday afternoon playdate worked wonders for reminding her how much she loves to play with her friend A at daycare. Huge sigh of relief, with crossed fingers, five more weeks until the end of the school year and we all know what could go wrong more often than not does go wrong to screw up the carefully crafted schedule.

The weekend was a relatively drama-free one from the girls, I was the instigator. Saturday morning soccer which PDQ still professes to be the best thing ever went well. She scored a goal during the scrimmage with the other team and that made her day. Then it was home where I was a serious crab. Not nearly enough sleep Friday night and a few extra hormones circulating makes for bad news. Boobah asked what seemed like a hundred times to play on the computer and I kept telling her to wait until I was done with what I was doing. After the 101st time Gman apparently told her to leave Mommy alone so she could finish what she was doing. So she followed me downstairs and says “Daddy says not to talk to you.” I told her she could talk to me but NOT to ask about the computer again until I was done. Two minutes later, Mommy? Yes Boobah? I’m going to ask you something different this time. And she did, I don’t remember what but the asking was cute and it wasn’t about the damn computer.

Finally PDQ and I rolled out to a birthday party at the bowling alley. I didn’t take a shower, threw on my gym clothes and figured I’d kill two birds with one stone since the bowling alley is across the street from the gym. Yeah, not quite. There were THIRTY kids at the bowling party. Not somewhere I felt comfortable dropping off PDQ and abandoning her. I stayed and chit-chatted with the other Kindergarten Moms while the girls bowled. I swear the one Mom has told me the same story every time I have interacted with her and I grinned and bore it yet again. I was so happy to get sprung after a mere two hours of torture. The parting gift? A bowling pin water bottle that I swear is the size of an actual pin. Where exactly do I store that?! Gman had the privilege of freeing all the candy from said pin later. The bright spot was a call from the birthday boy’s Mom later on raving about our present being the best one ever. Thank goodness, it was some foam rocket thing and I wavered about whether it would be a welcome addition but I decided to roll the dice. Score.

Yesterday we had friends for brunch that I threw together the night before. Es came bearing meat in her always overachieving way we had not just bacon but regular bacon, turkey bacon, low fat sausage, regular links, and kielbasa. No one in her circle has ever starved, just one of the things we love about her. Other than the children’s whining that they weren’t going to eat anything I cooked and my little explosion that they could starve, things were relaxing. We had a little champagne, a little of Paula Deen’s French Toast Casserole with Praline topping (which I dare say would be better with less butter) and all was right with the world. And then my dear, sweet husband played with the children outside and I took a nap. I can’t tell you the last time I snuggled deep under the covers on Sunday afternoon and actually slept, it was heaven. I woke up and could hear the girls giggling outside, apparently Gman was a criminal and they were the police who were going to track him down. Thankfully I missed his escape through the landscaping on the side of the house and only got to hear it in the re-telling. Thanks hon for a fabulous day of being you.

What makes ME a Mom? My Mom-ness

Ever since Parent Bloggers Network announced their blog blast for Mother's Day I have been pondering what it is that makes me a Mom. At work, playing with the kids, cooking dinner, in traffic, laying in bed I've been thinking about my Mom-ness.

The first thought that comes to mind is the day my first daughter was born. I'd felt awful for weeks and attributed it to heartburn (and later found out it was HELLP syndrome). I'd suffered through daily finger sticks because of gestational diabetes. I got a call from one of the doctor's in my OB practice who said in a semi-concerned voice, we'd like you to come to the hospital to repeat some blood work, it would be good to pack your things, you might be staying. I mean, I knew it was coming, I desperately wanted to not be pregnant and not feel like hell but I was scared. Sure enough they kept me, they gave me an epidural that didn't work, they broke my water when I was 1 cm to try and get things moving, they started the mag sulfate that made me feel even worse, my husband slept while I suffered, the nice nurse left, then dawn broke, the epidural was fixed and the new OB on duty said you are having this baby NOW and 17 minutes later she joined this world. Tiny and perfect. Hearing that cry welcomed me to Mom-ness. Suffering through that first night alone in L&D still being pumped full of drugs to keep my blood pressure under control knowing that no matter how bad I felt *I* was responsible for this little life was a real eye opening experience and believe me, it was ALL I could do to keep my eyes opens. I remember being terrified to say anything to anyone because they might take her away but I couldn't believe they kept leaving her with me to nurse. I could barely hold up my own head. But I did it, there was a determination there that I'd never, ever felt before. What an introduction to the sleepless nights, worrying if the baby was breathing, worrying whether the baby was eating, worrying if the baby was pooping, worrying about the vaccinations, worrying if I was doing anything right, worrying that my parents were going to leave (and to think I'd worried that they were coming to stay for a week) and lots of worrying about going back to work. That determination, responsibility and worry all have a name-unconditional love.

We lived through infant hood--twice (well Gman gets a big gold star for living through it FOUR times)! The story I often relay about when I *really* knew I was a Mom is story of the movie, the vomit and the poncho. Boobah was a little less than two years old and I was blessedly inexperienced of taking care of sick kids. Gman once went seven years without missing a day of work because he was sick, thankfully the girls inherited his immune system--we've been asked more than once at the pediatrician's office--she goes to daycare?--when they see the very, very thin chart. She had been throwing up on and off during the week but had been 36 hours vomit free when we decided it was safe to take her to the movies with friends--her first. We get to the movies with our friends and their three young girls stair stepped between ours. We sat in the front row of the back section. Lots of room for the kids to roam if needed and room to park the stroller. I thought the fact that Boobah curling up on my lap was a good sign, maybe she'd fall asleep in my lap and I could enjoy the movie--Robots--if I remember correctly. About 3 minutes later, all hell or rather lunch, broke loose. Boobah sat up and spewed toxic waste. My pre-Mom instinct to get the hell out of the way had vanished. I did the Mom-ly thing and caught the vile red tinged chunks (because my children only puke pizza, spaghetti sauce or other tomato based products) in her little purple poncho. Those are Mom instincts pure and simple, you can't be taught that it just suddenly comes out of you born from unconditional love!

So I guess what makes me a Mom is the overwhelming sense of responsibility for everything about this little person who can't do anything for themselves. The responsibility to teach them, the keep them safe, to nourish their body and soul. And for me that comes with worry--is this babysitter good enough, will that preschool be okay, what is me going to work doing to the, do they watch too much TV, where the heck did they learn to pole dance and what will people think of THAT? As they grow the shades of responsibility change but its still about food, safety and making their way in the world. The worry changes a bit too, its not so much about what I am doing its more about what are they going to do. The other part of motherhood that has blown me away is unconsciousness of putting someone else first. Would I catch vomit by choice--no. For my kid, there was no thought, I just did it. There are lots of things that I way over think but when I just let the instincts take over I am a better Mom for all of us. I like to think of it as just letting the love do its job.

My final thought on what makes me a Mom, all the stuff I learned from the Moms who came before me and the Moms who are sharing Mom-ness with me now. I come from a long line of old ladies. I lost three great-grandmothers since 2000 they were 96, 98 and 101 and I have good memories of each of them. They endured a lot and overcame it to share their experience with three generations. My grandmothers both turned 80 in the last 4 months and are phenomenal women. They are as different as day and night and from that I've learned lots of lessons about who I want to be as a Mom and a Grandma and maybe more importantly who I don't. My mother is a force unto the universe. A working Mom role model when most Moms didn't work. I am surrounded by wonderful Moms of my generation who teach me new stuff, make me think and in the process make me a better Mom. We are teaching each other to be a Mom in a time and a place that is so different from the one we grew up in. I feel privileged to share with them in real life and in world wide web.

Tag, you are it. Join in the blog blast sponsored by Light Iris and Parent Bloggers Network and grab your chance to win a $100 Spa Finder gift certificate. Just post about what makes YOU a Mom. Send a link to your post to parentbloggers@gmail.com for your chance to win.

Chocolate Feet

This morning I went for my fourth acupuncture treatment. I originally went to help with the development of some seriously screwed up sleep and to help me be better balanced, aka not fly off the handle at the slightest (or no) provocation. It was my guess that the two were somewhat linked, the less sleep I get the less able I am to control my emotions. The sleep part has been so-so, some good nights, some not so good nights and some completely sleepless nights. The emotional control stuff, much better. I definitely feel more aware of what is going on with my body and in my head. While regular sleep would be great I am seeing the light that this is a journey, not a quick fix. Probably good practice for the rest of my life, enjoy the journey, quit worrying about right now and just enjoy it for what it is. See—it also makes me a deep thinker.

So, in addition to needles this morning, I was the recipient of the Yin Heel Scrub. Not sure what the purpose was, other than my heels are horribly dry and cracked. Every appointment starts with a series of questions and some of the continuing themes are body temperature, breathing, pain, and digestion. This morning he asked me about my feet and their temperature when I go to sleep in cooler months. I told him that I often have to get up and take a hot bath to warm them up so I can sleep. He got a gleam in his eye and the next thing I knew I had a needle between my eyes, one in my sternum and was getting the most amazing foot and ankle rub. It wasn’t until after he was done that he shared with me that it was done with organic cocoa and that my heels might be a bit brown. I was a little mortified that my heels and ankles took a dip in the chocolate fountain. Luckily most of it came off but the stain on my cracked heels is still there for all to see since its supposed to be near 80 today and I’m wearing strappy sandals. At least they are brown and I match.

I am hosting our neighborhood women’s group Wednesday night. I got involved to find out what is going on in the neighborhood and make connections to people (especially ones with kids) when we moved last year. I was also dying to see the other houses in the neighborhood having been in none of them prior to buying ours. Its an interesting group, they plan neighborhood events, support a charity and there is a decent amount of socializing and gossiping as well. I volunteered to co-host this month which means make some food. My next door neighbor was hosting at her house, but now she’s having construction and carpet and a bunch of stuff done so we are at my house. I’ve been pre-cleaning for the wonderful Miss Betty for the last four days. I rescheduled her regular visit last week in order to have her come right before the meeting. Yesterday she fell and hit her head and ended up getting an MRI. Poor Miss Betty. I feel horrible for her and feel like it is some message from the universe telling me to chill out and that no one is really going to care what my house looks like. At least I hope not. We’ll do our best but this week is just too crazy to try and do everything the way I’d like it done. Deep cleansing breaths.

It’s Official, I am Losing My Mind

I’ve had a rough couple of weeks trying to keep track of things, my underwear, bra, shoe, school papers and this morning I forgot my ID badge and Boobah’s preschool bag. Yesterday I had a group of people show up for a meeting that I had forgotten about and had a really hard time articulating why we were there. Finally about half an hour in I found the right words and we got something done. I logged on to the computer three times this morning and never did remember what my intent was. It makes me wonder if the lack of sleep is finally catching up to me or maybe it is the change in routine with PDQs babysitter being out of commission for the next few weeks. I’ve been so good about exercise and my diet (other than the comfort food bonanza that was Easter). I hoped that sleep would finally follow suit, not yet.
I started seeing an acupuncturist last week in search of a good night’s sleep and an ability to better handle the stress in my life. Esmerelda has talked about her acupuncture experiences and swears that they’ve helped her fight off the strep that ran rampant in her house as well as deal with the stress of two kids, her mother and soon-to-be-ex-husband. I went for my first appointment, 2 hours long! The person I am seeing is a family friend who I’ve know for about 9 years. It was interesting to see him go back to school and train to be an acupuncturist. I was the benefactor of a massage during part of his training and many greetings where he looked deep into my eyes while checking my pulses. It was a little strange going to see someone you know so well in a new context, there were times when I had to suppress a giggle at something he said because it was off kilter with the way I know him. It wasn’t bad, just different. After the session I definitely felt calm and sleepy. I went home and vegged out on the couch with Gman and went to bed relatively early. I slept better than usual that night and generally just felt more calm. Tuesday I went for my second treatment, again I left feeling calm and sleepy, no surprise on the sleepy part since I was up most of the previous night. I had a relatively good night, it would have been better but Boobah came creeping in and climbed in bed. She made things too warm and too hard to try and contort around, I ended up carrying her back to her bed but the damage was done, I was up for more than an hour but I woke up yesterday morning for cycling class at the gym feeling pretty good and was tired by bedtime last night. Unfortunately sleep last night was more like a series of naps, again a night time visit from Boobah but thankfully Gman took care of her this go ‘round.

So, I’m not sleeping great yet. The sciatic pain from the rowing machine at my parents and then a 5.5 hour drive in the car is better as is my clicking jaw. I feel calmer as well, something everyone in my house will tell you is a good thing! I’m thinking that my energy shake-up has begun and with it maybe my multi-tasking prowess is being compromised. Makes me wonder if it is my body telling me that I should never have been doing it to the extent I have been in the first place. I guess time will tell. Thankfully I haven’t forgotten to pick up a kid anywhere or done anything really stupid at work. I feel like I’ve started an adventure to get to know myself better. I already feel like I am becoming more aware of my body, we’ll see if I can actually learn to listen to it. Hopefully my recent inability to remember anything not permanently attached to my body will clear as well.

Exercise & the Brain

While at home for Easter I caught up on Dad’s stack of Newsweek Magazine. I’ve been spending a lot of time at the gym and a series of articles on exercise and the brain caught my attention and I had my nose buried in it for a long time. They hit connections across the board—kids, the elderly, adults, depression. As a Mom, someone who has struggled with my weight and watching my Grandmother’s struggle to recover from a stroke the articles really spoke to me so I wanted to share them with you as well.

Where the heck did the weekend go?!

I used to crave the weekends, it seemed like we actually had some downtime and there was a chance to relax. Lately, I just don't get that feeling. We have managed to escape the Sunday Curse the last few weekends but I've headed into Monday morning wanting nothing more than to lay in bed and snuggle under the covers.

This weekend we had something going on everyday--Friday was youngest stepson's band concert so we drove the half hour over there. His band was good, the elementary/middle school band was painful to listen to, all those clarinets squawking along. Then we had to wait for him to change his clothes at his mom's house, and I suspect pack as well. After dropping by McDonald's to harass his big brother in the drive thru, we got home and it was after 9PM. I know, I am such an old lady, out until 9 on a Friday night!

Then Saturday started with a skating lesson at 10:15AM. Esmerelda met us there and took on kid duties so Gman and I could attend a wedding. I thought it was small and that meant it would be short, no dice, we were there for nearly 4 hours. So we got home around 4PM after stopping off to get the girls from Es. We invited her over for dinner and started the Sushi festivities when we got home. I tried to watch the Ohio State vs. Memphis game while I was trying to manage the kitchen. We made the sushi, we ate the sushi, Es and her Mom headed out and it was 8PM on Saturday night. The girls got showers and I thought we were good to relax. Ha! In looking at PDQs hair I saw a few suspicious looking brown specs. Aggggggghhhhhhhh, the lice were back. I thought we had eradicated them and were lucky enough to avoid them the second time around when everyone else at daycare got them--guess not. Gman and I were up until nearly 1AM giving everyone the Ceptaphil treatment; washing and/or drying sheets, pillows, and stuffed animals; and calling the daycare providers and our friends who'd had our kids recently.

Finally, Sunday, the day of rest. Yeah, right. We headed to church, then PDQ and I met friends for the local ice rink's Spring show. When it was over we headed to Dick's to acquire the needed stuff to start soccer next week--cleats and shin guards. By the time we hit the road for home it was after 4! Another day sucked down the tubes. When we got home all the girls cared about was playing in yard. Thankfully the little girl next door indulged them and they all hung out together. By the time we were done with dinner I realized that we hadn't even opened PDQs backpack from last week. Sure enough, her poetry journal and book-in-a-bag needed to be done. A bath, a hair check and time for bed--for all of us!

When PDQ told me she had a stomach-ache this morning I was almost relieved. I've worked all day but in the relative peace & quiet of my own home. I did eventually put on clothes.

The worst part of all, I know its going to get worse. There will be ice skating, soccer, youth group, and whatever else they dream up. Right now its only one kid, what happens when they are both old enough to do activities. I was talking to the neighbor last night and my head was swimming when she told me her 2nd grader had something EVERY night of the week and wanted to do ice skating but there was no time. I hope PDQ doesn't find out about it because there is no way I can keep up!

Come on over and clean your car!

Okay, just kidding. But head on over the Maven Says and check out my review of Blink...and its done products. They are billed as Mom's car solutions. And as a bonus, you'll find information on entering their MessMakers contest which runs through April 15. So go on over and check it out, you know how I love to tell you what I think!

It's Good to Be a Girl

Last Friday was "Mommy & Me" day for PDQ. I promised I would spend the day with her for her birthday and do what she wanted. I took the morning off and volunteered in her class which is generally a hoot. Getting called "Miss Abby's Mom" and hearing them try to one up each other is so darned cute. One little guy always makes me laugh, and he knows it, so he tries really hard! He wears cowboy boots and hunting shirts or in this case Motocross. He reminds me a lot of my BIL. He messed something up and declared "oh tartar sauce!" which nearly made me fall out of my chair. I was a little disappointed when Abby's crush moved on from him to another little boy in the class. Apparently PDQ had told everyone she was getting a pedicure. One little girl informed me her Mommy did manicures and pedicures and she even waxes people's feet. We would be forgoing that particular service.

After school we headed to the mall, she wanted food court Chinese food for lunch--her FAVORITE, she declared. And then it was off for the ear piercing and pedicure. On our way to the aforementioned attractions we stopped at Zale's to pick up my engagement ring which they took hostage THREE months ago to repair a prong that they had just fixed and replace a baugette that fell out. They had finally called to tell me it was ready. I got there and lo and behold, they couldn't find it, and they gave me attitude about it--was I sure they called? Yeah, just as sure as I was that they'd had it since the beginning of December and I was not happy about it at all. Then they had the audacity to ask me how much the estimate was, I was tempted to lie, but then sending a nasty letter wouldn't be nearly as effective. You know, someone apologizing for it taking so long or that they couldn't find it would have made me feel much better but nope, they couldn't even come up with common courtesy. I have already warned G-man that he is never, ever to set foot in the store again.

Okay, sorry for the detour...so we headed to Libby Lu, the girliest store in the world. They call everyone princess, everything is pink, and their bags are actually miniature carboard purses. She picked out aquamarine flowers since they are her birthstone AND blue is her new favorite color. So, I sign away my life, we pick out earrings and wait for the big event. When the woman marked PDQs ears I was a little bit surprised, I had no idea how tiny her earlobes were--there really wasn't a ton of room for earrings. PDQ was totally cool about it and held my hand but didn't even squeeze when they put the earrings in. I had left this part of the adventure out when telling my Mom what we were up to--she made us wait until we were in the third grade. I was sure she'd have some "advice" for me and I knew that I could do without it. I knew PDQ would show her as soon as we got home and she wouldn't dare say anything in front of her.

We ventured down the corridor to the nearest nail place where I'd always gotten good service at a decent price. The guy working at the desk lit up when he saw PDQ and was thrilled do her toes. He was very excited about the possibility of giving her flowers on her toes. Definitely the highlight of my day to have my winter nasty feet attended to while watching PDQ enjoy herself. She had to perch on the edge of the chair to get her feet in the water. She didn't think much of the exfoliating scrub, but she was digging on the massage. She picked out blue polish and got flowers on her big toes. All the women in the place ooh and ahh'd at which time she also showed them her ears as well. She was soaking up the attention like my feet were soaking up the moisture after the very long, hard winter.

There are days when I worry about having two teenage girls. There are days when the whining just about drives me out of my ever loving mind. And then there are days like this. I couldn't believe how grown up my little girl is getting. It was so fun to hang out with her and hear her take on the world. To be part of her world at school so I can keep up with the stories. I am so glad that I have a job that is flexible enough to volunteer every month and spend the important days with my kids.



My Suburban Bliss (yes, you get two posts, two posts in one!)

Since we started house hunting this time last year part of my suburban dream was to have a backyard where the kids could play. Well, as cute as my kids are, they aren't great at keeping themselves occupied outside without stuff. We decided that Santa would bring a swing set to cap off our new backyard because there was no way we were getting one installed late last summer after moving and praying and waiting and waiting and praying and waiting for our house to sell.

Finally, yesterday G-man completed the task. You can read his take on it here. For me, the crowing moment was yesterday afternoon when I took this picture from my kitchen window. Yes, the girls can play outside and I can watch them from the kitchen or the family room.

And, who wouldn't want to be a part of this family?! Kudos to G-man for his fine workmanship (and not asking me for worker's comp!)

And today's challenge for Super Mom....Childcare Calculus

Will it never end? Today the new wrinkle in our scheduled to the moment lives--PDQs babysitter needs to have surgery and will be out for nearly a month. "Lucky" for us that one of those weeks is Spring Break and she can go to daycare with Boobah. After that, the assignment for Super Mom is to coordinate daycare before and after school.

Boobah's babysitter (BB) doesn't live on a bus route for PDQs school, she can watch her after school but getting her to BB creates some scheduling issues for Super Mom. BB might be able to pick her up at school but will need Super Mom's van to do so and needs cooperation of another child's parents as he arrives from preschool at the same time school ends.

PDQs babysitter (PB) has asked two neighbors to help out during that time. Its up to Super Mom to negotiate times and rates with these neighbors. PDQ knows one of the women marginally and dislikes her son, she doesn't know the other woman at all.

Grandma & Grandpa live 5 hours away, Grandma works Tuesday and Wednesday every week but maybe they could come provide some relief.

Boobah's school (BS) has an enrichment program one afternoon per week that Boobah attends as well as one of PDQs classmates. Can Super Mom negotiate a car pool with said classmate and get BS to allow her to attend for 2 afternoons?

Just considering the possibilities has given me a headache. I have a whole month to get everything negotiated and in place--thank goodness for small favors. I manage big projects for a living and sometimes I think arranging our lives is far, far more difficult!